Opening Day, Take 3

Firstly I'd like to apologize for not updating in so so long. Road trips, alien abductions, etc. For now I'm back.

Secondly... oh, hey, the baseball season started. Like, for real.
I suppose the season really started when Boston and Oakland met a few days ago in Japan (choosing, I guess, to play in a stadium between the two cities, but on the OPPOSITE side of the globe). When those games aired live in the eastern time zone I was either at work or at sleep so I could only catch highlights. They re-aired those two games during more suitable hours, but I can't watch a pre-recorded baseball game unless it's at least a decade old. Anyway, everybody looked like they had a lot of fun (except for Jason Veritek... 0 for 8, six strikeouts) and I'm not so much of a fogey traditionalist that I wouldn't encourage more of the same in the future. Opening more seasons in Japan? Sure!

However, Japan is stuck in some weird continuum where space and time don't matter, and so the REAL opening day took place Sunday in DC. Although I wouldn't pick a Braves/Nationals matchup to ordain a new season I'll take what I can get. Unfortunately I was at work (I should really just quit) and only caught the last couple innings. But what an exciting last couple they were. A come-from-behind tying (via a passed ball... oops), and Atlanta hope squelched by a game-winning walk-off home run. Good stuff.

But of course making the Youtube rounds is video of the Washington crowd saying BOOOO-urns to the President. God bless a nation where its citizens can openly heckle the leader of it's country, and God bless a President who can throw a ball sixty feet without bouncing it.

(Not Youtube, but there's less of a chance of this getting yanked by the MLB deities.)

I couldn't get a good look at the Nationals' new stadium, but I didn't mind what I saw. Centerfield is a bit pointy (and a lot of batters will curse that extra few feet) and the light fixtures are huge (a lot of fielders will curse instant blindness). Maybe during some DC trip in the future I'll be able to catch a game.

A game I'll catch for sure is this Friday's Blue Jay home opener against the Red Sox. Our seats are way up in the mesosphere (possibly atop the CN Tower), but it'll still be an enjoyable experience.

Baseball-wide opening day games will be starting soon (like, in minutes). I'll be splitting television time between the KC/Detroit game and the NY/Toronto game. If I'm up to it I'll liveblog whatever my viewing habits permit me to watch, but you should be in front of the TV yourself.

My schedule may have just filled up for the next seven months.

Fantasy Ball Roundup

I know maybe five people read this, most of whom are related to me, but it's fantasy baseball time over on Yahoo! and if you're interested in joining a league then let me know. If enough people want to play then we'll engage ourselves in some competitive statistics-comparing throughout the season, and if I'm winning I'll probably gloat about it here. If NOT enough people want to play... then I'll go hang out in the public leagues like I do every year. ALONE.

I don't think I have anything to offer as far as prizes are concerned. I don't know. Maybe I could find something. No Mantle rookie cards or anything like that.

Leave a "yes let's do this" comment in the, uh, comments area so as to provoke the shy lurkers to do the same. Remember, the more the substantial increase in site hits merrier.

Juan Gonzalez: Okay?

I'm interested to see how this Juan Gonzalez thing is going to work out.

The Cardinals generously decided to give Gonzalez another chance and signed him to a Minor League contract last month. In past years Gonzalez has attempted several "comebacks" with other teams, but injuries have prevented him from doing anything productive. His last Big League appearance came in 2005 -- one at-bat for Cleveland (he grounded out to third and effed up his hammy) -- and he's been hanging out in the Atlantic League and Puerto Rican League since then. Even those seasons were cut short due to injury. If you're a betting man, the odds of Gonzalez getting hurt and only playing a handful of games (be it at a major or minor league level) are somewhere around 1-to-1.

It's interesting that the Cardinals, a NL team, signed him. Due to his fragility it would seem best to make him strictly a DHer. Less opportunity to strain things. And, in fact, during these spring training games the Cards have used him in the DH spot. But since he's vying for an outfield role with the team he needs to, y'know, play outfield. And so it shall be done, as LaRussa has decided to no longer utilize the DH at all during pre-season games. I suppose if Gonzalez misses the final cut, yet still does respectfully enough in the minors, he could get called up for interleague games. But I don't know if the Birds will ever be that desperate. Anyway, we'll see if he can shag pop flies without tearing up vital leg muscles.

He is, by the way, doing alright at the plate so far. In 22 Spring Training at bats he's had six hits, five RBIs, a double and a homer. I'm a little concerned that he's only walked once, but these are exhibition games and none of this really matters anyway.

Despite his propensity for injuries, and despite being a chronic whiner, I hope he does well. Juan Gonzalez used to be the best, and I don't really like seeing people fall from glory (unless they really REALLY deserve it, but I usually reserve that judgement for tyrannical political despots). But more than that the Cardinals need their line-up filled in a bit more. Albert Pujols, Troy Glaus, and Chris Duncan (and even Rick Ankiel) can swing a heavy bat, but offensively the team is still thin. Obviously Gonzalez isn't going to hit 40 homers like he routinely used to, but any little offensive pop in the roster would be greatly appreciated.

The Big, The Fat, and the Weighty

Two things inspired this post. Firstly, it is spring training time, the time where returning baseball players try to get back into shape and shed those winter pounds. Some have more work to do than others. Secondly, I just had bacon and birthday cake for lunch. It's good to know that there exists professonal athletes who have similar food standards as me.

Though lists like these have been done to death, we still enjoy rooting for the chubs. Their imperfections make them more like us, and what wouldn't we, the Joe Everymans, give to play Major League Baseball?

This is a short list of active players, though you'll notice some of these players are active in leagues other than the Major one. Perhaps I'll follow this list up with one full of rotund old-timers. Jumbo Brown, I'm looking your way.

Without further ado, here are a bunch of Major League fatties.


Calvin Pickering
Baseball-reference.com lists his weight as 275. The Kansas City T-bones, where he currently plays, scale him at 280. Wikipedia has him at 318. Which is it? I don't know, but at six-foot-five that's a whole lotta man out there on the baseball field, and as a first-baseman he makes for a healthy target. He spent 2006 playing ball in Korea where he was likely the largest thing any of them had ever seen.


Ronnie Belliard
More like Ronnie BELLY-ard, yuk yuk. Baseball-reference, always the conservative ones, list him at 180. The Nationals have him at 195. When he showed up to spring training in 2000 he topped 200. This wouldn't seem so bad were it not for the facts that A) Belliard is only five-foot-eight, and B) he's a second baseman. Though he's got surprisingly good range for being so squat, he doesn't have the sure hands of many of his other slimmer second base counterparts.
[Picture bonus: two pudges for the price of one.]


C.C. Sabathia
The Indians unabashedly list his weight at 290, though it wouldn't surprise me if he ekes over the 300 mark. Even at an imposing six-foot-seven that's still a whole bunch of pounds. But having just won the AL Cy Young award and the Warren Spahn award for best left-handed pitcher, maybe there's something to be said for pitchers with great girth.


Rich Garces
As a Major Leaguer his weight was listed at 250. Now a member of the Nashua Pride, they've got him down to 235. Do I believe either of those numbers are accurate? No way. Even if they were, El Guapo is only six feet tall and visibly very round.


Walter Young
I believe Young has the "official" Major League weight record when, weighing 315 pounds, he was called up by the Orioles in 2005. Now a member of the Winnipeg Goldeyes, he is "officially" down to 295.


David Wells
Despite being a 20-game winner, a three-time all-star, the 1998 ALCS MVP, and not to mention having once thrown a perfect game, people mostly think of David Wells as being that out-of-shape old guy. He is still listed at 250 pounds by MLB.com, but since being diagnosed with diabetes he's had to adjust his diet. He might be down to 248 at this point.


Chris Britton
Baseball-reference has him at 278, but MLB.com rounds (no pun intended) him up to 280. Considering George Steinbrenner's disdain for fat pitchers, Britton may want to think about losing a few (dozen) if he wants to stay on the organization's good side.


Frank Thomas
I'm not going to call Frank Thomas the Fat Hurt or anything like that, but it is obvious that he is an exceptionally large man. Officially his six-foot-five frame supports 275 pounds, and not all of it is chub. His baseball-hitting power comes mostly from his arms, and that becomes apparent when you see him hit a home run while standing on one foot.


Johnathan Broxton
Six-foot-four, 290 pounds? Are you kidding me? He hides it well under his baggy uniform, but there's a reason why Mark Grace calls him "The Biggest Man in the World."


Olmedo Saenz
A fan-favorite in L.A., Saenz will now have an opportunity to show off his pinch-hitting skillz in New York as he recently signed a minor-league contract with the Mets. Due to his roundess and his ability to smash a fastball, Saenz is affectionately known as The Killer Tomato. Physical attributes: six-foot-one, 230 pounds.

Mike Sweeney, ex-Royal

Mike Sweeney is no longer a Royal.

He's given Kansas City a lot of solid years, and though I'm sad to see him go I feel this is a good decision by Royal management. Injuries have only permitted him to play half-seasons for the last couple years, and Ryan Shealy and Ross Gload and Billy Butler have shown good potential to be everyday players either at first base or in the DH position. In short, the Royals kinda don't need Sweeney around anymore. He was terribly expensive anyways.

He's signed with the Athletic's organization now, so hopefully he'll have a good spring and be able to hang out on Oakland's bench this season. Of course, he also has the option of retiring, but that wouldn't be any fun for anybody.

There are two things I remember best about Mike Sweeney:
1) DC Talk's "Jesus Freak" used to be his come-to-bat song.
2) In a game in 2002 he lost his mind and charged then-Tiger pitcher Jeff Weaver.









That was a good fight, if such a thing can be said.
I suppose he could still do these things in a Sacramento River Cats uniform, but it just wouldn't be the same.

But if I ever find myself missing him too badly, there's always the Mike Sweeney bobblehead that sits atop the bookshelf in my livingroom, overseeing all with a thumbs up and a wry smile.













Looks just... like him?

The Numbers Game

Sometimes you can really get lost in the ocean of numbers that covers all of baseball. And by "you" I really mean "I". All it takes is some sort of slight statistical oddity to send me on some inconsequential goose chase, comparing percentages and making mental tallies.

Follow my latest contrail:
88 Topps Cards, a blog that features, well, 1988 Topps baseball cards, today talked about Jesse Orosco's card. Wanting to check out his career numbers I headed over to Jesse Orosco's Baseball-Reference.com page and scrolled through the numbers. I perused his batting stats (because I'm always interested in how well pitchers can hit) and noticed that in 1997 and 2002, despite being credited with zero at bats, he still managed to reach base. There's a number of ways to accomplish this, but most common is the walk. And indeed, in Orosco's only plate appearances in those two seasons he was walked; once in '97, and once in '02. What's more, these two plate appearances were the last two of his career. What's further more, in 2002 not only did he take ball four in his only plate appearance of the year, he also came around to score. If you read the seventh inning play-by-play, it's amusing to imagine the 44-year-old Orosco huffin' from first to second on a base hit, huffin' from second to third on another base hit, then gladly walking home on a Brian Jordan grand slam.

So then I got to thinkin', what other pitchers have scored following their only plate appearance of the season where they reached base via a walk? That's a lot of criteria, and you might expect the answer to be "once by Jesse Orosco in 2002", but it's happened twenty-four times since 1900. The last person to do it was Brandon Lyon of the D-backs in 2006. In fact, he did it in his only career plate appearance to date. The first? Somebody named, and I'm not making this up, Farmer Burns of the 1901 Cardinals. Besting Lyon's effort (sort of), not only was this the only plate appearance of his career, this was his only Major League game EVER. He made the best of it though by stealing a base. Good ol' Farmer Burns.

That's another tangent altogether, isn't it? Stolen bases by pitchers. I'll get right on it.

Anyway, that's how I waste hours at a time.

The League of Extraordinary Stoves

To keep myself sorted out this winter, and to counter the doldrums induced by the immense lack of baseball playing, I've started an (ir)regular feature covering the off season trades, signings, and whatever else puts new players in new uniforms. I may still have no idea who plays for what team come spring, but at least this time I've tried.
David Eckstein to the Blue Jays
The Jays probably didn't need to sign Eckstein at all, seeing as how they already had John McDonald and the newly aquired Marco Scutaro as viable shortstop candidates. But on the other hand, Eckstein only played in 117 games last season (and only 123 the season before). In the seemingly-likely event that he misses another forty games in '08 at least the Jays will have plenty of back-up. Hopefully Eckstein will remain healthy and not commit twenty errors like he did last season in his limited playing time.

Marco Scutaro to the Blue Jays
Athletics receive Graham Godfrey and Kristian Bell
Regular shortstopping may be out of the question now that Eckstein's on the scene, but second base may still be a possibility for Scutaro. However, regular second baseman Aaron Hill had a pretty good year at the plate last season and the Jays would also be hesitant to bench him. Somewhere somebody in that middle infield is going to get platooned, but I suppose an abundance of quality players up the middle is better than too few. But for Scutaro, there's also the outfield option as he has experience in both left and right fields.

As for Oakland's new players, Godfrey only competed at the A-ball level in '07, and while he put up good numbers in college... well, that was college. We'll check back on him in four years.
Bell doesn't appear to be anything special either. I'm assuming these two names were randomly picked out of a hat.


Scott Rolen to the Blue Jays
Cardinals receive Troy Glaus
Defensively Rolen still has his sparkly glove and the comfort of knowing that David Eckstein is still standing twenty feet away from him (for whatever that's worth). Offensively Rolen's bat has wained, though given a full season (which, given his recent propensity for injuries, seems unlikely) he can still hit 20-25 home runs. Also, he has never been named in reports accusing him of using illegal muscle chemicals, which is an instant advantage he has over Glaus.

Glaus himself is not so injury retardant either, having only played in 115 games in '07. He's not as sure-handed at third as Rolen is, and he strikes out a lot at the plate, but he does have good power. The Cardinal lineup, with Albert Pujols, Glaus, and Chris Duncan, will have some pop in it this year.


Jon Lieber to the Cubs
The Cubbies' starting rotation certainly isn't bad, and I don't know that Lieber would be much of a contribution. He's been so-so these past couple seasons (an ankle injury cut his 2007 season in half) and at age 37 is getting kind of old. I personally don't expect too much out of him and wouldn't be surprised if he were used in long relief.

Mike Cameron to the Brewers
Last season Cameron only hit .229 at his home stadium Petco Park in San Diego (versus the .254 he hit on the road). That alone would make it seem like a good decision for him to bail on the Padres, but the season before he actually did better at home than on the road. Regardless, he's playing in Milwaukee now where he'll have to cover less ground in center field. Bill Hall, who just got converted into a full-time center fielder last year, will either go back to the infield or re-convert into a left-fielder.

Josh Phelps to the Cardinals
Only 29 and Phelps is already a journeyman. He's been affiliated with eight organizations since August of 2004, but has made the most of his limited big-league time. Phelps is a good bat to have off the bench (enough so that the Blue Jays often used him as a DH) and carries the added flexibility of being a back-up catcher. Despite being signed to a minor league contract with the Birds, he'll probably poke his head up several times in the Bigs this year. Jason LaRue, watch your back!

Marcus Giles to the Rockies
Giles had an awful season with the Padres last year, hitting only .229 with 4 home runs in 116 games. Perhaps he needs a more hitter-friendly park, in which case Coors Field would be great for him. He remains capable, given a full season, of hitting .300 with twenty homers, but it's not certain whether or not he'll ever reach the high expectations he set for himself back in Atlanta. Regardless, he's signed a minor league contract and will have spring training to prove if he's deserving on any kind of permanent role, sparring with other infielders for a shot at Kaz Matsui's vacated second base position.

Brett Tomko to the Royals
The Royals have a surprisingly strong bullpen, but they need all the starting pitching help they can get. Tomko isn't a pitching stud or anything, but his presence definitely won't hurt the team either. He's coming off a bad 2007 season, so really there's no where to go but up, right?

*THIS JUST IN*
Johan Santana to the Mets
Twins get Carlos Gomez, Phil Humber, Deolis Guerra, Kevin Mulvey
The deal has yet to be finalized, but for now it looks like the Mets are getting the best pitcher in the Majors. And if you thought he was a mind-boinkingly good American League pitcher, wait 'til he starts business in the NL. I'm already giving him the Cy Young award. But though he will greatly enhance the Mets' already-awesome roster, I'll stop short of declaring the NYMs 2008 World Series champions. Although the odds are slim of lightning mis-striking twice, the Mets' end-of-the-year collapse last season is a hard thing to ignore. This will be a good team, though.

As for the Twinkies, they've already lost Torii Hunter, and now that Santana's leaving the team has a couple holes to fill. Minnesota has already acquired Craig Monroe and Delmon Young (part of a six-player trade back in November) to fill out the outfield, and Gomez will also see some time in the outfield, but probably as a back-up. Gomez is also faster than crap (see his minor league stolen base numbers) and if he can learn how to hit he'll be trouble on the basepaths.

Humber, Guerra, and Mulvey are all young pitchers, with Humber the only one with any Major League experience (nine cumulative innings of big league action). Guerra is only 18 years-old and we probably won't see him for a few more years. Humber and Mulvey, on the other hand, have a good chance at making an impact for the Twins this season. Both put up good strike-out-to-walk ratios in the minors, and Minnesota will look to beef up their starting rotation somehow.

Just Filling Space

In lieu of a real post, I'm just going to link something four days old (which itself is a reaction to something from a week-and-a-half ago).
It involves the Official Chatroom of Major League Baseball,
Scott Rolen,
and poop.

The Dugout!

Cobb's Ghost Ball

I was browsing the Library of Congress online image archive (as I'm often wont to do) when I came across this 1912 baseball card of Ty Cobb and Hughie (or "Hughey" according to the back of the card) Jennings issued by American Tobacco.

Hugh Jennings was awesome and maybe I'll mention him another day, but I just want to briefly talk about the action shot on the card. It's cropped from this 1909 (or was it 1910?) picture snapped by Charles Conlon.

This is likely the most famous image of Ty Cobb (and Conlon's most popular photograph), a great picture of him sliding into third and upending third baseman Jimmy Austin. You know Austin's going to eat the dirt because Cobb's momentum is taking him one way, and Austin is leaning the other (with his center of gravity all crazy). When you also notice that Austin isn't actually touching the ground then you know it's all over for him.
Cobb, as usual, appears vein-bustingly intense.

Some years after the picture was taken, somebody editted in a baseball to make the action appear more actionly (as if that were necessary). See if you can find it.

The real ball is somewhere in left field either due to the catcher's errant throw or due to Cobb's attempt to impale the fielder with his pointy spikes.

Anyway, I read about this fake ball many years ago, and ever since then everytime I come across the image I immediately look for the stupid thing. It appears in about 90% of the cropped pictures I see, which is why I made note of that baseball card. Even though it's a 1909/10 image appearing on a 1912 card, evidently the "ghost ball" hadn't yet snuck its way onto reprintings. I don't know who added it or when, I just know it distracts me. AND NOW IT WILL DISTRACT YOU.

As an aside, third base itself looks quite soft and comfortable.

Old timey baseball photographs are neat.
Old timey baseball is neat.

Carl Cares About Baseball's Integrity

Forget everything I've ever said regarding the Mitchell Report.

This here is the definitive analysis. Pay special attention to why more Red Sox names weren't mentioned in the report.

I need those pants.